the soft rain - 1

I remember, the night clatters with rain.

It's a gentle rain, soft on the skin, with warmth in the air.

That was a summer night last year, I remember it perfectly - I stood outside for a moment and took in the fresh air. A lot's happened since then, a lot's changed. I was finishing high school and now I'm working my ass off as a mechanic's apprentice. Like what the fuck was I even thinking? I should've taken the school thing a little more seriously. My sister still scolds me over the phone in university across the country. It's getting a bit ridiculous but I miss her so I kind of let her do it. Don't tell her that though, she'll get all up in her high horse and shit.

My dad died, that happened too. He took his life because apparently he was living two lives and supporting two families in secret. It became a little too much for him. We were all caught by surprise - he never mentioned the family or anything about them in the letter. He left nothing but a hole in mum. She didn't know what to do. She still doesn't know what to do. All she does these days is stay in her room, watch some T.V., stare at nothingness for hours on end. Dad messed her up.

Now you know why my mind's on that rainy night last summer - everything was just so damn perfect in that moment. I'm left here cleaning up after dad's mess, don't get me wrong - he was kind man all our life. Which is why it was surprising and I don't hate him. My sis? Yeah she hates his guts. After his death, she couldn't stand the way mum took it so she left and went to the farthest University she could find - Berkeley, apparently it's really prestigious. So yeah, she's smart but not smart.

I coped with it differently - when it came to his death, I sort of cut the emotion. I cried once but that's it. I feel bad sometimes but someone's gotta do the shit around here. So I took a job at a vehicle repair shop and work as a mechanic's apprentice. My mentor is a douche-bag, he fixes a car but damages it so the customers come back. A real scumbag really. I've learned to catch him do that shit and fix it when he isn't around. Over the year I've learned enough to not need him. I got Google, YouTube, the internet - it all taught me more than that piece of shit of a mentor.

But yeah, that's me in the last 365 days. A real piece of work. Work is all I've been doing, really. Barely supporting my mum but hey, my life's not my friend. I've learned that the hard way and I'm not looking for any more surprises.

Alright, I gotta sleep because I'm getting called in for something at the shop early morning - night.